My birthday went as well as could be expected yesterday and that’s actually saying a lot considering my pessimistic attitude going into it.

I used my chocolate oat bran muffin recipe to make my birthday cake. I’ve done it before and it’s perfectly sufficient and it made me happy. I got to eat cake for breakfast and not feel at all guilty about it.

I normally spend the day trying to include my kids in all things birthday related while repeatedly begging them to just get along with each other and not complain as a present to me. This is about as effective as asking a leopard to change his spots since the only time my kids really fight is when I ask them not to. Go figure.

So, yesterday I just signed them up for every possible activity and after a breakfast of birthday cake I hustled them out the door and spent the day by myself. I went to the beach, took a short walk, swam in the ocean, rode the shuttle and generally had a relaxing time of it. The kids went out to an evening activity and my husband and I sat in the hot tub, took leisurely showers, and when the kids got home the babysitter came and he and I went out to dinner.

Part of me felt guilty, but the heck with it, it was awesome. The best I could have expected.

Of course, the pain in my lower back only got worse as the day progressed and by the time we got home last night it was spasming like hell. This morning I had to call the doctor and be seen. She thinks it might be a bulging disk causing nerve pain in addition to the strained muscle. Great. She gave me a prescription for the only medicine I can take for it (no narcotics or NSAIDS for me) and my husband is out now picking it up. It’s a steroid and I’ve been warned it could make me moody, jittery, and irritable. Great.  At the moment, I have a bag of ice held in the waistband of my pants and I’m hoping it kicks in soon to help with the pain.

Tomorrow morning I will have to get into a car and ride, sitting down (which is the most painful position to be in) for 3 or 4 hours to get to the wedding we are going to. With my son and daughter the only attendants in the wedding and me the day-of-emergency-contact for my sister-in-law (and soon to be brother-in-law) I can’t really back out now. One more thing that must simply be endured. But I’m ok with that. They deserve it and while it will be tremendously uncomfortable for me, I’ll survive and it probably won’t make anything worse for me.

But, now I’m facing the fact that I can’t really do my regular exercise for a while. Walking isn’t terrible for my back, but briskly walking 5 miles isn’t on the docket for the foreseeable future. So, I’ll try for a slow short walk later today and see how that goes. I can’t stand the thought of being totally immobilized when I know how important exercise is for my weight loss/ weight stabilization. But I don’t have much choice.

Two last things in no particular order:

1. I ate more than my single serving of fruit yesterday. I ate about four servings of fruit instead of one and I kind of don’t care. It was my birthday and if that was my only indulgence it could have been much worse.

2. Last night when I was in serious pain and I was struggling to roll over in bed my husband woke up too. He leaned over and gently moved my leg for me so that I wouldn’t have to use my lower back muscles. I know it doesn’t sound like much, but it’s his simple act of kindness that reminds me to be grateful; even though this is difficult, I am still blessed.