So, after last week’s weigh-in that showed a rapid gain of 3 pounds I was doing my best to stay focused. I spent Wednesday, Thursday, and Friday of last week trying to just put one foot in front of the other and make reasonably smart choices without being reactionary.

Then, in a fit of stupidity I decided to get on the scale on Saturday morning and of course I was punished for this folly by seeing the scale go up another 1/2 pound. Yet, somehow, I managed not to go over a cliff emotionally.

I just shook it off and stuck with the plan. I wish I knew how I did that. Maybe, I’m at a place where it’s just coming more naturally to me but it’s not quite so second nature yet that it’s not still noteworthy.

I’m still thinking about going back on “Attack” just so that I can eventually get to my “ultimate goal weight” of 145 lbs. But that feels separate from any sort of panic about the scales reading right now. It just feels likes I’m getting my mojo back to tackle the last hurdle.

I got on the scale this morning with a certain amount of trepidation. What if? I kept asking myself. But, the scale was down to 158.5 and I just sort of blinked at it for a second. Honestly, I wasn’t expecting that.

It makes me think that last week was either A. some sort of fluke, or B. that whatever weight came on was so recent that my body didn’t really feel like it needed to hold onto it.

Either way, whatever the reason, I know I need to pull a reasonable lesson from this and I’ve been mulling what that reasonable lesson should be.

I think the lesson here is that when I just stick with the plan and make choices that feels right in my gut then things work out ok. When I start tinkering and scheming I lose sight of my path and since my goal here is emotional and physical stability sticking with the plan makes a lot more sense.

This process of monitoring what I eat is never going to end. There is no expiration date on the dedication I need to keep myself at a normal weight. I can imagine that feeling like a burden, but in some ways it seems like a very simple and low cost to pay for a lifetime of health and happiness so this is a fact of my life that I accept.

For today, I feel willing to pay it. Onward.

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