Well, today was my new biweekly weigh-in day for maintenance.

I get myself into a weird head space with these weigh-ins because I have a hard time focusing on the cause and effect relationship between what I’ve been doing with my eating these past few weeks and the numbers the scale shows me. So it’s nearly impossible for me to correctly anticipate what I’ll see on the scale.

I’m supposed to be in the Consolidation Phase of the Dukan Diet right now, which means my weight is supposed to remain stable. But, I’ve been pretty reluctant to change anything about how I’ve been eating because things have been going so well for me emotionally and mentally that I haven’t wanted to mess with things.

I am supposed to be eating vegetables six days a week with one day of pure protein.
I am eating vegetables five days a week with two days of pure protein.

I am supposed to be eating one serving of fruit per day.
Twice now I’ve had 1/2 of a serving of fruit.

I am supposed to be eating one serving of starchy foods per week.
Once I had a serving of starchy food (that was Hanukkah and I had one and a half latkes).

I am supposed to be having one celebration meal every week.
I’ve had only one celebration meal: on Thanksgiving.

The thing is, as I said, this is working for me emotionally. I’m not getting obsessed with food and I’m comfortable in my own skin. The food choices I’m making are pretty healthy and I’m enjoying the little bit of freedom I’m giving myself with the vegetables. I’m even starting to play around with recipes to come up with great tasting vegie-meat combinations. I feel good. I don’t want to mess that up.

But, at the same time, I started getting a little wacky in the head over the weigh-in. I became convinced, for no apparent reason, that when I stepped on the scale this morning I would have gained weight. Then, knowing that I’m usually wrong about those assumptions, I convinced myself that I would have lost weight.

All of it is crazy.

So, how do I fix that? I think I need to decide if I’m going to: A. Still try to lose weight, which would mean officially moving back to the Cruise Phase or B. Actually start reintegrating foods, which would mean fully moving to the Consolidation Phase. This middle ground vagueness probably isn’t helping my head.

In the end, this morning my weight was down 1 pound from the last time I weighed myself two weeks ago. That’s pretty great and it makes me want to go back to cruise. But the idea of going back to alternating days of pure protein vs. vegetables & protein is totally unappealing.

I’m going to have to sit with this decision for a few days and find some clarity around what will be best for me right now.

For today, I’m eating vegetables with my protein and I’m down 36.5 pounds from the start.

All in all, a good day.